我不美，單身，大齡，就活該不受歡迎嗎？

「來源：｜獨霸上海的妖怪 ID：Lexie_World」

曾聽過這樣一句話：「一個故事至少有三個版本：你的，我的，和真的」。

在我們從小聽到大的《安徒生童話》、《格林童話》裡，女主角總是溫柔善良，美麗動人，而故事裡的其他女性總是一副醜陋、惡毒的模樣，作惡多端，令人討厭，比如《白雪公主》的皇后和巫婆，《灰姑娘》裡的後媽和姐姐。

如果我們以那個剁掉腳跟也要把腳塞進水晶鞋的兇惡姑娘的視角來看這篇童話，故事又會呈現出怎樣不同的樣貌呢？

今天推薦給大家的短篇小說《不受歡迎的女孩》，便是一次“惡毒後母”、“醜陋姐姐” 的獨白和辯護。

作者是瑪格麗特·阿特伍德（Margaret Atwood， 1939—），一位加拿大小說家、詩人、文學評論家。看名字，大家或許會覺得陌生。但她作品改編的美劇——《使女的故事》，火遍了全球，相信很多讀者都看過。

這部短篇小說便來自瑪格麗特的文集《好骨頭》。在書中，作者對許多文學掌故（戲劇、神話、童話等）進行了重新詮釋，提供了一個新的視角看待傳統敘事中的女性。語言輕盈靈動，詼諧機智，好多處精妙的諷刺都能讓人會心一笑，拍案叫絕。

Unpopular Gals

作者瑪格麗特·阿特伍德

譯者包慧怡

出版社河南大學出版社

Everyone gets a turn， and now it‘s mine。 Or so they used to tell us in kindergarten。 It’s not really true。 Some get more turns than others， and I‘ve never had a turn， not one！ I hardly know how to say “I” or “mine”； I’ve been “she， her， that one” for so long。

“每個人都會輪到的，現在該我啦。”至少，他們在幼兒園裡是這麼告訴我們的。這並不是真的。一些人會比別人多輪到幾次，而我卻從沒捱到過，一次也沒有！我幾乎不知道該怎麼說“我”或“我的”，這麼久以來，我始終只是“她”、“她的”、“那個人”。

I haven‘t even been given a name； I was always just “the ugly sister”； put the stress on “ugly”。 The one the other mothers looked at， then looked away from and shook their heads gently。 Their voices lowered or ceased altogether when I came into the room， in my pretty dresses， my face leaden and scowling。 They tried to think of something to say that would redeem the situation——“Well， she’s certainly strong”——but they knew it was useless。 So did I。

我連個名字都沒有。一直以來，我只是“那個醜姐姐”，重音在“醜”字上。其他的母親一看到我就把視線調開，輕柔地搖著頭。當我穿著漂亮的裙子，臉色鉛灰，皺著眉頭走進房間時，她們立刻就壓低嗓門，或者乾脆鴉雀無聲。她們想要說上幾句救場的話－－至少，她的確很健壯呀－－但她們知道，這於事無補。我也知道。

cease

［sis］ v。 to stop happening or existing 停止

leaden

［ledn］ adj。 dark grey 鉛灰色的

scowl

［skal］ v。 an angry or hostile expression appearing on one’s face 作怒容；繃著臉

redeem

［rdim］ v。 to make somebody / something seem less bad 補救

You think I didn‘t hate their pity， their forced kindness？ And knowing that no matter what I did， how virtuous I was， or hardworking， I would never be beautiful。 Not like her， the one who merely had to sit there to be adored。 You wonder why I stabbed the blue eyes of my dolls with pins and pulled their hair out until they were bald？ Life isn’t fair。 Why should I be？

你以為我不憎恨她們的同情，她們那佯裝的善意？我知道，無論我做什麼，無論我具有何等美德，無論我多麼兢兢業業，我永遠也不會變得美麗。不像她，她只要隨便坐在那裡就能受人仰慕。你納悶我為什麼用針扎進布娃娃的藍色眸子，把她們的頭髮拔光？生活並不公平，我又何須公平？

virtu

ous

［vrtus］ adj。 behaving in a moral and correct way 品德高尚的

stab

［stb］ v。 to push at something with your finger or with something pointed that you are holding （用手指或手中尖物）戳；捅；按

bald

［bld］ adj。 having as little or no hair on the top of one’s head 禿頂的

As for the prince， you think I didn‘t love him？ I loved him more than she did； I loved him more than anything。 Enough to cut off my foot。 Enough to murder。 Of course I disguised myself in heavy veils， to take her place at the altar。 Of course I threw her out the window and pulled the sheets up over my head and pretended to be her。 Who wouldn’t， in my position。

至於王子，你以為我不愛他嗎？我比她更愛他；一切事物中我最愛他。我可以為了他斬斷自己的腳，我可以殺人。當然了，我把自己隱藏在厚重的面紗下，在聖壇前取代了她。當然了，我把她丟擲了窗子，把自己藏在頭巾下，裝作是她。在我的處境下，誰不會這麼做？

disguise

［dsɡaz］ v。 to hide something or change it， so that it cannot be recognized 掩飾

veil

［vel］ n。 a piece of thin soft cloth that women sometimes wear over their heads and that can also cover their face。面紗

altar

［ltr］ n。 a holy table in a church or temple 聖壇

But all my love ever came to was a bad end。 Red-hot shoes， barrels studded with nails。 That‘s what it feels like， unrequited love。

但我所有的愛情不過落了個慘絕人寰的下場。燒得紅熱的鞋子，嵌滿釘子的木桶－－不被回饋的愛就是這種感覺。

barrel

［brl］ n。 a large， round container for liquids or food 桶

stud

［std］ v。 to dot or cover （with）用。。。點綴；用。。。覆蓋

unrequited

［nrkwatd］ adj。（of love） not returned by the person that you love （感情）得不到迴應的

She had a baby， too。 I was never allowed。

Everything you’ve ever wanted， I wanted also。

她還有個嬰兒。我則從未被允許過。你曾經渴望過的每一樣事物，我也渴望過。

A libel action， that‘s what I’m thinking。 Put an end to this nonsense。 Just because I‘m old and live alone and can’t see very well， they accuse me of all sorts of things。 Cooking and eating children， well， can you imagine？ What a fantasy， and even if I did eat just a few， whose fault was it？ Those children were left in the forest by their parents， who fully intended them to die。 Waste not， want not has always been my motto。

我想，這是誹謗。別說這些廢話了吧。就因為我年紀大了，又是獨身，眼神也不好，他們就指責我犯下了各種罪過。烹製並品嚐兒童，好吧，你能想象麼？多麼異想天開！就算我真的吃了幾個，那又怪誰？那些孩子的父母把他們拋棄在森林裡，他們一心願意他們死去。物盡其用，清心寡慾，一直是我的座右銘。

libel

［labl］ n。 the act of printing a statement about somebody that is not true and that gives people a bad opinion of them； the statement that is printed 誹謗

motto

［mɑto］ n。格言

Anyway， the way I see it， they were an offering。 I used to be given grown-ups， men and women both， stuffed full of seasonal goodies and handed over to me at seed-time and harvest。 The symbolism was a little crude perhaps， and the events themselves were——some might say——lacking in taste， but folks‘ hearts were in the right place。 In return， I made things germinate and grow and swell and ripen。

不管怎麼說，就我看來，他們是一種供品。以前，每逢播種或收穫季節，供給我的都是些成年人——男女都有，體內填滿了時鮮貨。這種象徵主義恐怕有點兒殘忍——一些人或許會說，這缺少品位——但人們的出發點總是好的呀。作為回報，我讓作物發芽生長，成熟飽滿。

stuff

［stf］ v。 to fill a space or container tightly with something 裝滿

goody

［ɡdi］ v。 pleasant， exciting， or attractive things 好東西

crude

［krud］ adj。 not exact or detailed， but may be useful or correct in a rough， general way 粗略的

ger

inate

［drmnet］ adj。 If a seed germinates or if it is germinated， it starts to grow。使發芽；發芽

swell

［swel］ v。 If the amount or size of something swells or if something swells it， it becomes larger than it was before。使增大；增大

ripen

［rapn］ v。 When crops ripen or when the sun ripens them， they become ripe。（指莊稼）成熟

Then I got hidden away， stuck into the attic， shrunken and parched and covered up in fusty draperies。 Hell， I used to have breasts！ Not just two of them。 Lots。 Ever wonder why a third tit was the crucial test， once， for women like me？

然後我就被藏起來，塞到閣樓裡，烘乾，縮水，被埋在發黴的帷帳裡。見鬼，我以前可是有乳房的。不只有兩個，是很多個。說真的，像我這樣的女人，怎麼會曾經覺得擁有第三隻乳頭是莫大的考驗呢？

shrink

［rk］ v。 If cloth or clothing shrinks， it becomes smaller in size， usually as a result of being washed。縮水

parch

［pɑrt］ v。 to deprive or be deprived of water； dry up 脫水；使乾涸

sty

［fsti］ adj。 having a smell that is not fresh or pleasant 黴臭的

drapery

［drepri］ n。 cloth， curtains， or clothing hanging in folds 織物

tit

［tt］ n。 A woman’s tits are her breasts。乳房

Or why I‘m so often shown with a garden？ A wonderful garden， in which mouth-watering things grow。 Mulberries。 Magic cabbages。 Rapunzel， whatever that is。 And all those pregnant women trying to clamber over the wall， by the light of the moon， to munch up my fecundity， without giving anything in return。 Theft， you’d call it， if you were at all open-minded。

還有，為什麼總是把我和花園畫在一起？一座奇妙的花園，裡面長著令人垂涎的鵝莓、有魔法的捲心菜、萵苣，不管那是什麼。那些懷孕的女人總是想方設法趁著月光翻過牆壁，大嚼特嚼我那些肥沃的蔬果，而我連一點補償都得不到。你得有非凡的肚量，才能僅僅管這叫做盜竊。

clamber

［klmbr］ v。 to climb there with difficulty， usually using your hands as well as your feet （手腳並用，費勁地）爬

munch

［mnt］ v。 to eat food by chewing it slowly， thoroughly， and rather noisily大聲咀嚼

cundity

［fkndti］ n。 fertility； fruitfulness 肥沃；豐收

That was never the rule in the old days。 Life was a gift then， not something to be stolen。 It was my gift。 By earth and sea I bestowed it， and the people gave me thanks。

過去，事情可不是這麼辦的。那時，生命是一件禮物，不是用來偷竊的。它是我賜予的禮物，我藉土地和海洋賜予的禮物。那時人們對我心存感謝。

bestow

［bsto］ v。 to give something to somebody， especially to show how much they are respected 授予

It‘s true， there are never any evil stepfathers。 Only a bunch of lily-livered widowers， who let me get away with murder vis-à-vis their daughters。 Where are they when I’m making those girls drudge in the kitchen， or sending them out into the blizzard in their paper dresses？ Working late at the office。 Passing the buck。 Men！ But if you think they knew nothing about it， you‘re crazy。

真的，從來就沒有什麼邪惡的繼父，只有一大堆肝臟白得像百合花的鰥夫，我殺了他們的女兒，他們卻輕易放過我。當我讓那些姑娘在廚房裡做牛做馬，或讓她們穿著單薄如紙的衣服去暴風雪裡辦事時，他們去了哪裡？在辦公室加班。推卸責任。男人啊！如果你以為他們對實情一無所知，你準是瘋了。

widower

［wdor］ n。 a man whose wife has died and who has not married again 鰥夫

drudge

［drd］ n。 a person who has to do long hard boring jobs 苦工

blizzard

［blzrd］ n。 a very bad snowstorm with strong winds 暴風雪

pass the buck

to refuse to accept responsibility for something， and say that someone else is responsible 推諉責任

The thing about those good daughters is， they’re so “good”。 Obedient and passive。 Sniveling， I might add。 No get-up-and-go。 What would become of them if it weren‘t for me？ Nothing， that’s what。 All they‘d ever do is the housework， which seems to feature largely in these stories。 They’d marry some peasant， have seventeen kids， and get “A Dutiful Wife” engraved on their tombstones， if any。 Big deal。

那些好女兒們有個問題——她們太好了。逆來順受，卑躬屈膝，興許我還該添一樣：哭哭啼啼。一點都不乾脆。要是沒有我，她們會有什麼好下場？絕不會有。她們會做一輩子家務——那些故事裡說的不外乎是這個——會嫁給某個農民，養十七個小子，最多在墓石上得到“一個忠誠的妻子”的墓誌銘。有什麼了不起的？

obedient

［bidint］ adj。 doing what you are told to do； willing to obey 順從的；服從的

niv

［snvl］ v。 to cry or sniff in a way that irritates others （令人厭煩地）啜泣；抽抽噎噎地哭

engrave

［nɡrev］ v。 to cut words or designs on wood， stone， metal， etc。刻上

mbstone

［tumston］ n。 a large stone with words carved into it， which is placed on a grave 墓碑

I stir things up， I get things moving。 “Go play in the traffic，” I say to them。 “Put on this paper dress and look for strawberries in the snow。” It‘s perverse， but it works。 All they have to do is smile and say hello and do a little more housework， for some gnomes or nice ladies or whatever， and bingo， they get the king’s son and the palace， and no more dish-pan hands。

是我挑起事端，是我讓事情得以發生。“去馬路中央玩，”我對她們說， “穿上紙做的衣服，去雪地裡找些草莓。”這很變態，但無比管用。她們只需要微笑，再向某位侏儒或“好心的婦人”或隨便什麼人問聲好，為後者做一點微不足道的家務，事就這麼成了。她們嫁給了國王的兒子，住進了皇宮，再也不會在洗碗擦碟時弄粗了手啦。

stir st

h up

to try to cause arguments or problems 挑起爭端

perverse

［prvrs］ adj。 showing a deliberate and determined desire to behave in a way that most people think is wrong， unacceptable or unreasonable 乖戾的；有悖常理的

gnome

［nom］ n。 an imaginary creature that is like a tiny old man with a beard and pointed hat 小矮人

Whereas all I get is the blame。

God knows all about it。 No Devil， no Fall， no Redemption。 Grade two arithmetic。

但我得到的只有責怪。上帝對這一切再清楚不過了：沒有魔鬼就沒有墮落，沒有墮落就沒有救贖。兩年級學生都會算。

redemption

［rdempn］ n。 the act of redeeming something or of being redeemed by something 救贖；償還

arithmetic

［rθmtk］ n。 the part of mathematics that is concerned with the addition， subtraction， multiplication，and division of numbers 算術

You can wipe your feet on me， twist my motives around all you like， you can dump millstones on my head and drown me in the river， but you can‘t get me out of the story。 I’m the plot， babe， and don‘t ever forget it。

你儘可以拿我擦腳，儘管扭曲我的動機，你可以在我頭上壘一堆磨石，把我沉到河底，但你可沒法把我趕出故事。寶貝兒，我，正是情節之一，永遠別把這個忘了。

dump

［dmp］ v。 to put something or unload it somethere quickly and carelessly 扔下；傾倒

The End

我不美，單身，大齡，就活該不受歡迎嗎？

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